It's A Lonely View
"We live alone, we die alone. Everything else is an illusion." -The Art of Getting By
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Anonymous asked: If I may ask, what are you religious views, if any?


Answer:

thefrogman:

I grew up Catholic.

Baptism.

Taught by nuns in elementary school.

I stood. I sat. I knelt. I sang songs out of tune. I knelt some more. I yawned.

Sister Cathy yelled at me for eating a crayon.

First communion. Jesus crackers. Jesus wine.

First confession. “I stole my brother’s Legos and then lied to my mom about stealing his Legos and then he punched me. I’m hoping he confesses to you about the punching thing cuz that really hurt.”

Don’t forget to kneel.

Confirmation!

High school church youth group.

I read the bible. I was probably supposed to do this earlier.

The beginning bits seemed harsh. I liked Jesus quite a bit, but his stories never seemed to fit with the ones that surrounded them.

Questions arose.

Did they put animals that can swim on the boat? I mean, could you just leave the ducks off the ark to save space? Maybe they could swim along side and you just toss them bread. 

Why did he free Moses and make them wander around for so long? Haven’t they been through enough? 

(To Father Steve) Technically a whale can’t ingest a human. Jonah would have got caught in its throat and they both would have died.

*angry priest face*

So are you saying that God made a bet with Satan to see how much shit Job would put up with? That doesn’t seem very ethical for a deity. 

*angrier priest face*

Then I started learning about the politics of religion and more important questions arose. 

What’s wrong with being gay? That passage is in the same book that says slavery is totally fine. 

What’s wrong with contraception? People are dying of diseases that you could have prevented if your missionaries gave out condoms instead of bibles. 

And finally…

Why am I sick?…….. How is this someone’s plan for me? 

My views became very “if any.”

That world made no sense to me. I started working things out on my own and solving my problems without asking for His help. Those beliefs held me back. They held me back because they were not my beliefs. They were given to me by others and I went along with it. 

I don’t begrudge anyone with faith. I can’t say if they are wrong or right. I think faith helps a great deal of people. I still consider Father Steve my greatest mentor and one of the kindest (and most patient) individuals I’ve ever known.

I know a lot of people seek answers of creation and life after death, but I don’t think about that much anymore. I don’t really care. My mind has filled up with so many curiosities that may actually have an answer. Answers I can grasp and understand. Trying to know the unknown seems futile to me. 

I just want to live the best life I can. I wish to be a good person because it is the right thing to do and not because I fear a fiery pit. I’m better at being a good person now, more-so than when I believed. 

Not believing works best for me. Results may vary.

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